[Tango-L] Elitism

[Charles Roques]

I want to spread good tango karma, give back something to this dance that has enriched my life.  I see a newbie not
being asked to dance. I ask her to dance. We do the best we can, nothing flashy, just a simple dance. But now better followers, especially those who are visiting from out of town  who dont know me well, ignore my cabaceo, assuming that the previous partner i had is "the best i can
do." 

I think your perceptions are open to interpretation.  That may not be the reason they are not choosing to dance with you.   I have had the exact opposite happen in Buenos Aires when I sat a long time at "Lo de Celia" wondering why no women were responding  to my cabeceo, especially one in particular.  Then I realized that they didn't know me and didn't know if I could dance well or not.  I asked a beginner to dance and she didn't dance very well, but it got me on the floor and after that I got responses the rest of the night.  If you are a good dancer it will show, whether you dance with a beginner or an advanced dancer. 

i used to be guilty of the gymnastics myself, but I've come to realize that's not the real fulfillment of tango, there is no subtlety or emotion to it, and when i watch it done, usually poorly, i am bored to tears,  so my dance these days is much simpler and quieter.

Perhaps they remember you from before. ;-)

 Anyway, after a tanda with a newbie, the clique followers do not want to chance being seen dancing with me
for fear of catching the same stigma, and then not being invited by the elite alpha dogs in the room.  So they wont chance a tanda with me. 

Again you are interpreting this. Being refused is damaging to the ego but it's part of tango.

Cheers,
Charles