[Tango-L] Social-ethical behaviors and protocols

[Roger Patrick]

       Hi,

> Independently of what was in the mind of the first milongueros, I believe
> with confidence that to consider the premise: "chasing the opposite sex is
> the main objective in the mind of contemporary milongas attendees either
> here or elsewhere" as valid is 100%questionable and even unacceptable. The
> first set of realistic concerns that pop up right away in my mind are:

  I have the impression that we are setting up a straw-men here.
Neither Trini nor else claimed that chasing the opposite sex is the
main objective for most of the attendees of the milongas most of the
time. However, that it is not the main objective or that it is not
what's in people's mind all the time does not make it an unacceptable,
immoral, or condemnable motivation to dance tango. This is an
unjustified jump to a conclusion, and it comes through as a personal
moral viewpoint which the author wants to force on others, disguised
as an argument.

> 1) It twist or prostitute (thinking in its origins) the whole new concept
> and "reason d'être" of modern Argentine Tango dancing.

  Petitio principii. Also, maybe I was just missing out something, but
has there been a proclamation for the "raison d'etre" of tango
somewhere? Where do I sign?

> 2) It is dangerous, an invitation to trouble.

  I don't see too much of an argument here.

> 3) It may jeopardize the preservation of good relationships and
> communication among dancers.

  If someone acts inappropriately on or off the dance-floor according
to the opinion of a dancer, she/he has reason to choose not to dance
with the person anymore. No-one claims everyone should have a "right"
to get dances, and people shall be free to decide with whom they want
to dance with. The discussion is not about bastards who force
themselves upon ladies and demand dances aggressively, but about
polite dancers who might also have motivations relating to sexual
appetites in mind. Confusing the two would again be a basis for a
straw-men.

> 4) It is a no-no particularly in many contemporary milongas where more and
> more often we witness the presence and participation of teens, minors, and
> even children.
>
  "Think of the children!" Ouch.

> 5) With an increasing percentage we are also observing the attendance of
> married couples and also married dancers whose spouses are not attending
> simply because they do not like tango, they are absent, or they cannot
> dance.
  ...and ?

> 6) Local milongas and practilongas are gradually becoming periodic family
> and friendly oriented gatherings where a group of well known community
> dancers are socializing, sharing ideas, practicing new concepts, and
> learning from each other, in a cozy environment, supposedly free of concerns
> that some needy (single or not) individual may put her o his eyes (and
> hands) in your significant one, looking for something "else" than dancing.
  Think of the children 2, but now the adult version!

> 7) The demands of A.T. are such that an authentic and committed dancer
> cannot get distracted with this "chases" and all the subsequent maneuvers if
> he wants to be good.
  I'm not sure whether I follow. Cannot or should not? And why?

> 8) Those that do not adequate prioritize their goals and ignore décor
> exhibiting improper conduct may be tolerated at milongas, but they are
> easily detected and often avoided putting themselves on the spot "de
>  gratis."
  Again, you are assuming the point you want to make by gesturing at
an supposedly uncontroversial notion of "adequate priority". Mind you
again that we are not talking about aggressive behavior but about
differing motivations. And it should be up to each individual
attendees to decide what to do with the information he/she gathers
about the motivations of the other, and not up to some though-police
attempting to enforce a conservative moral viewpoint.

>
> The second statement: "People take up all sorts of hobbies hoping to meet
> people and find love is just a personal opinion and a gross generalization.
> My own hobby as an example may be enough. Just
> let me discard for a moment the love for music, passion for art, enjoyment,
> neuro-motor improvement, musicianship, refinement, and a mean of
> self-expression, among many other "good reasons" in my list of genuine
> motivations. Since music is my hobby and my profession it will be reasonable
> to say that I also play, practice, and teach for money, recognition, or
> both. Indeed, I did it during practically all my long life and 27 years of
> marriage with absolutely no need to meet people or find love.
  More power to you! Just please don't generalize to what other people
may desire and how other people may want to prioritize.

> However, in our society it seems that almost everything is accepted,
> including "making a catch" at A.T. dances, with the following convenient
> excuses in mind: --It is not illegal! --What is bad for one is good for
> others! --I'm clear with my conscious! --What are you talking about? --It is
> a free country! --Go for it! --If not now when? --Why not? --It is nothing
> wrong!  And so on.
  And let's hope it stays it that way as well.

  Cheers,

        P.