[Tango-L] What makes a good dance, ladies?

[dierdre black]

Dear Myk: 

Sorry, for the delay in this reply but have been thinking about your questions, all this time. 

Re: all your specifics about embrace pressure, tricks, etc., the simple answer, for me, still comes down to the same thing:

                "whatever gives us a "bloody good dance.""

If one over analyzes any dance, it squeezes all the "juice" out of it.  Besides....the truth is, everything depends on the couple, the moment, the night, the place, the music, the space, the onda, what I had for dinner and did earlier in the day, as well as him/her.  The best leaders and followers are those who are so relaxed, confident and flexible, in their own center that they can subtly feel where their partner is at, physically, at that moment AND adjust to whatever conditions are presented in and outside of themselves, with the infinite variables.  I will usually give my partner subtle signs as to what's comfortable(dialogue/connection), in our embrace, his pacing and steps, in that moment, for me.  For him to plan ahead for a certain pressure, tricks or anything, skips the point of our specific connection.....then, he is in his head instead of his body and missing the uniqueness of our pairing.  A follower may like a stronger embrace, more tricks
 and speed, one day/milonga and the same one, entirely different things, another.  Same with leaders....not to mention the locations, orchestras/djs, teachers present, etc.  All of these things are at play and make your specifics question almost unanswerable and moot. Tango dancing is an improvisatory "zen of the moment" thing, rather than a pre-formulaic strategy. A good follower is a simple creature. All we ask is that you, simply....whatever your particular style of dance may be...be sensitive to our "signs"; don't bump us into other people/furniture, constantly or grope us; stay on the beat and try not to bore us with infinitely repetetive/inappropriate, steps/patterns. Everything after that is "Gold". 

Cheers,  dnb