[Tango-L] Ecstasis and Control

[Astrid]

> On Thu, Mar 27, 2008 at 12:25 PM,  <buffmilonguera at aol.com> wrote:
>> I have always been taught, as a follower and leader, that both parties
>> have to feel comfortable in the embrace.  This means that, if I am
>> leading a partner I do not know, I might ask if close embrace is
>> comfortable,

Ugh, and what is one gonna answer to that? Jeez, do you guys have to *talk* 
about EVERYTHING?

> There is a lot to negotiate about the embrace. Everyone's sense of
> personal space must be respected. I find there are some interesting
> cultural differences in how these feelings are accommodated.
>
> In classes in North America, I've heard teachers tell leaders that the
> woman decides how close she is willing to dance with her partner. In
> this approach, the man offers an embrace and the woman chooses to step
> in close or not.

Yes. That is ok by me. But I have also had men who offered a wide open 
embrace as was their habit, and when they started to feel that I dance 
differently, let me move in closer and held me tight. Not everyone gets to 
be that lucky, of course. ; )