[Tango-L] Don't blame your follower

[Krasimir Stoyanov]

Playing the violin is not an easy task. In fact, it is among the most  
difficult instruments. So, I do not agree that the expression gives us  
association with someone who "reads the manual" and "presses buttons",  
and expects machine-like behaviour.

Being fine tango instrument is difficult, and requires high skill  
level from both partners. Otherwise, the lady reverts to being a  
machine that tries to follow orders (marks) coming from the man.





Quoting Astrid <astrid at ruby.plala.or.jp>:

>> I find nothing offensive to play the role of a Stradivarius in the hands
>> of
>> a talented musician.
>>
>> But you, ladies, are free to feel offended and miss the whole point.
>
> Talk like this is cheap if it comes from a man.
> The point is that the whole tone of the statement of "playing her like a..."
> whatever instrument tells me through intuition and experience that we are
> not dealing here with a "talented musician" of the class of someone who'd
> own a Stradivarius.
> I'd rather be a broom in the hands of El Pulpo (was this him?) in that video
> than to be manhandled by someone with the approach discussed above.
> Just like a lover who thinks, he just needs to press those buttons described
> in the manual he read can make a woman feel like a machine who has an
> engineer fiddling around with it, the tangodancer's efforts in getting his
> "instrument" to play what he wants may not be appreciated the way he
> expected.
>>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Victor:
>>> The 'playing her like a violin' comments are generally offensive but have
>>> their place.
>
>
>>> And, to the comment .. "that's great! he is playing her like a fine
>>> violin..".
>>> I agree - yuck!! is the perfect response.
>>>
>>> B, if this is your first post, please, let's hear more from you.
>>>
>>> Keith, HK
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> On Mon Dec 17 4:04 , buffmilonguera at aol.com sent:
>>>
> once I was
>>>> watching a beautiful woman dance with a man who was leading - really
>>>> admiring her adornments, musicality, beautiful footwork, and nuance - I
>>>> couldn't wait to dance with her - when a guy standing next to me said,
>>>> "that's great! he is playing her like a fine violin......." yuck!!
>>>> This passionate, beautiful dancer described as an inanimate object that
>>>> he "uses," Maybe it is oversensitive to have such a strong reaction to
>>>> imagery that other folks use to describe their tango....but part of it
>>>> comes from the experience of being told "follows only really need to
>>>> learn to follow," having inexperienced (or worse, experienced) leaders
>>>> wrestling with you to "get" gancho after gancho after gancho - and
>>>> those are usually the same leads who will violently twist your
>>>> shoulders over and over to get you do the boleo they demand, and, my
>>>> favorite, the leads who will stop dead in the middle of the floor
>>>> during a milonga and scold, "you were supposed to do...whatever," to
>>>> which the best response, that most follows are too gracious to say, is,
>>>> "you were supposed to lead it...."
>
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