[Tango-L] Who leads what, who follows what

[WHITE 95 R]

> Average at least 1 hour each week in privates with wonderful excellent
> teacher. But I also taught and competed nationally in my other dances, even
> judged at local level. I recognize dance that sucks and dance that is
> kick-ass. I am way not a kick-ass tango dancer. I need more years with
> many different partners. My regular partner is kick-ass good, but I still
> clunky guy. Her goodness can hide my clunkiness. Is good. But she & I
> know.

Something does not compute in this program. The picture is not complete or I'm hopelessly confused. You say that you are taking lessons from a great teacher for at least one hour per week and practicing a lot too. You mention hundreds of hours of practice and that your partner is great but you suck.... Well, normally I'd say that it's possible for some guys to have that much practice and lessons and still not be very good at all. But that would only be the case with guys who just can't dance very well at all. You on the contrary, are not only a good dancer in other genres but a national competitor and a judge at the local level.... Obviously you have talent for dancing so that can't be it... I'd say a fairly dedicated tango dancer probably dances about 4 hours per week, maybe 8 if he goes to 2 milongas and a class or 2 per week. That works out to about 400 hours per year... You've beat that by 50%.

Perhaps you are too hard on yourself and your expectations are unrealistic. It could also be that you are not going to milongas and only dance with one partner? If that's the case, I strongly suggest that you get yourself to all the milongas and tango events that you can. Europe is absolutely full of tango. Dance with all the women you can and consider changing teachers. Although your teacher might be wonderful and in fact, quite good, it might be a "mala junta". Just a bad fit and it won't work for you. Likewise with your partner. Perhaps she is a fabulous and very good tango dancer, but that does not seem to be helping you... You might find more enjoyment dancing with others. You might in fact find that you don't suck at all.

Cheers,

Manuel