[Tango-L] And then - men learning

[Keith Elshaw]

I was taught in the beginning by real pros from Buenos Aires.

Poor them - I had no dance experience.

Even so, I had an instinctive ear for the music and what it called for.

I was told to stay away from milonga for at least 2 years (I believe this
advice is not uncommon). I was not shown vals. I was shown steps - by
numbers. Thank gawd that isn't done as much any more.

Unfortunately, back then I was learning in a city without regular dancing
opportunities - so all I could do was go to classes. This will tell you
why my views have become what they are.

After a few years of frustration - during which I learned "the numbers"
very well and even assisted my teacher in teaching that way - and being
asked to teach - I was at a boiling point of frustration.

I would sit all night if there was a dance opportunity, being totally
intimidated. When I saw good male dancers, I wouldn't show my face (even
though I supposedly "knew" a lot).

This was already years after doing demonstrations with my (Portena)
teacher. Choreography. I know as much as anyone that knowing tango steps
is not to know dancing.

So, at that boiling point, I hired my teacher for a private class and
humbly told her what I wanted to know. How do I just move fluidly like
real dancers instead of what I do now?

I was told (unhelpfully), "just do it."

That teacher severed any relationship with me right then. I was
respectfully asking (and paying) for help. I could see that the teacher's
attitude was that I, as a gringo, would never get it, so why bother?

Why bother indeed.

I split.

I moved to a city where tango lives and stopped trying to learn anything.
I just went dancing and listened to what my heart was telling me to do.

Fast forward a few years.

I learned in that time that the best way for me to learn was to be open to
my partners (remember - there are a lot of great dancers here). I learned
so much just from dancing for pure pleasure.

And I will tell you that much of what came to me in moments of inspiration
was from those women I told you about who never took classes - the ones
who DANCE.

I had begun a transformation which brought so many rewards.

Then, an epiphany.

There was a lot of bumping going on. Like every male, I was upset about
it; took umbrage.

One night as I was walking back home, I had a little talk with myself
(being a life-long autodidact, this happens frequently).

"Keith," I said, "If you are being bumped, you should admit that at least
50% of the problem must be being caused by yourself."

Lightening strikes.

Everything about my dancing changed in an instant. From then on, my focus
in dancing became protecting my partner. That brought me into the close
embrace. Brought my dancing inside.

And naturally, I found myself - who I am when I am dancing tango.

I had been taught "things" to do. I now found the tango I was looking for
-in the harmony and intimacy of the couple lost together in the music and
movement.

My style emerged. Walk, turn, walk, turn, walk, little thingy when the
orchestra slows down, walk, end. Always making sure my partner doesn't get
bumped and I don't bump.

Tango heaven.

All of a sudden, if I may say, I found even better partners.

So, when I teach, I tell people I don't "do" anything. Walk, turn, walk,
little moment of embellishement (ALWAYS LEAVING THE WOMAN HER MOMENTS TO
EXPRESS HERSELF), end. (To me, a tango is a conversation, not a lecture).

In the first class, I show men how to start, walk the ronda, stop, avoid a
traffic problem. Now this is how we do the same thing in a vals. Now this
is how we do the same thing in a milonga. First class - the whole picture
of WHY we are learning anything.

If you tell a new student it is difficult, they think it is. If you tell
them it is simple, they think they can do it.

When I see "teachers" teach a class, the men run for the exits at the end.

When I teach a class, the men stay to dance becuase it is simple and fun.
Later for the complex stuff.

I see most teachers "doing" things - even when they dance for pleasure.

I see most beautiful dancers just enjoying the embrace and their partner.
This is why I love watching the older folks from Argentina dance simply.

So, as I suggested in my last email, I practice what I preach. If I am
hired to teach, I give everything I can in the shortest possible time to
just get them going. Have fun. Come back if you want more, but don't worry
about what you know or don't know - just move in harmony with your
partner, the music and the other dancers. One foot, then the other.

Tango is SUPPOSED to be FUN. Leave the mind and thinking out of it, and
that is possible from the beginning.

I'm not a great dancer, so I do not claim to be a great teacher by any means.

I don't teach unless approached. I mostly recommend other people (such as
Tomas Howlin, in my city. He is a real dancer/teacher in the classic
sense).

Yet, I am a teacher by profession. And sometimes I fancy tango teachers
could use a good dose of learning in order to move things along in a more
felicitous fashion.

I respect tango teachers who make a living by it ... I wouldn't be ashamed
to make a living that way.

I just wish they were more courageous.

I believe many tango teachers fear they won't be successful if they don't
show "things."

But, when asked for a private class, they go right down to the real stuff:
posture, walking, musicality.

So, I have no compunction about telling new people to take private classes
(after learning basics) so they will learn what is really important from
their teachers.

And I tell them - teachers don't give much for $10. For that, they are
happy to give a "step."

I guess that it is the way it is.

So: dance if you want to learn. Take a private. Dance. Incorporate. Dance.

Tango lives on the dance floor - not in the class room.

Try this concept: learn from your partners.

This is tango.


(Sound of throat clearing as man hopes he is understood to be humbly
helpful if possible even though a mundane mortal).