[Tango-L] Afraid of the close embreace

[Sergio Vandekier]

Jeff says:
 
         "Ok, I'll play Devil's Advocate. In many cultures -- including Anglo-Saxon ones -- respecting personal space is the most basic way to show you acknowledge that the other person is indeed a person. Crossing into somebody's personal space without their permission is one of the easiest ways to register contempt for them. In many cultures (including the US) invading someone's personal space is exactly how to pick a fight. So yes, in other countries it might not been seen in the same way, but the fact of the matter is that this is strongly ingrained for a good reason and if the dancers are having a hard time overcoming it, it is most likely due to the fact they are showing very polite and respectful treatment of their partner, which is a good thing. Your assessment that they are "afraid of the embrace" strikes me as fatuous and culturally grievously insensitive. I'm all for understanding and embracing other cultures, but it should work both ways, shouldn't it?"
 
***You have expressed very well the position and perspective of those belonging to the culture that you describe.
 
...and it works both ways...in fact Argentina is a melting pot of different cultures, the predominant one seems to be the Mediterranean, but we all grew up knowing that there are people of different tastes and culture.
 
We grow up touching, kissing, embracing, ... we as men touch, kiss and embrace our male friends and relatives when we meet them and when we say good bye. We do the same with our female friends except for... touching (what a pitty):)).
 
We do not invade anyone's space without their permission, when we meet a person of a different upbringing, and we are introduced, we say
 " How do you do" with little emotion, without touching, just standing stiff in front.   
 
This whole subject is very well portrayed in the movie "My fat, big, Greek wedding" (I believe that was the name, more por less).
 
When we dance tango, we allow the lady to establish the type of embrace she wants. We do not force any embrace on anybody. If we do not like the way a particular person dances we do not ask her to dance again, that is all.
 
At the same time as soon as you embrace a woman, in a few seconds, she knows how this particular tango is going to be; just by the way you embrace her.
 
Summary:  Tango is a product of Argentine Culture, We grow up receiving and giving physical contact in a proper form at proper occasions, or not, we choose .
 
Tango gives you the same possibilities of dancing in open embrace, in close embrace or in an elastic varying embrace.
 
A good dancer does not force any embrace on his partner the same as he does not use physical contact where it is not wellcome.
 
The choice is yours.
 
With best regards and...and Argentine embrace, (for those that want it,for the others "How do you do?" ,
 
Sergio