[Tango-L] social ethical behavior

[Dubravko Kakarigi]

You may think of this what you wish, but here's an excerpt of my experience from 

a recent visit to Bs As dancing at a traditional afternoon milonga (3-10pm). 

My partner and I always set together and mostly danced with each other. On three 

occasions (out of four visits to that milonga), men (each older than 60, I 
estimate) signaled me from a distance to see if it is okay to invite my partner 
to dance; I affirmed, they then connected with my partner with a cabeceo and 
danced. 

On one occasion a young fellow stepped out in front of our table, which was at 
the edge of the floor so he was standing on the floor with no one else on the 
floor, and asked my partner to dance - she declined.

BTW, my partner and I had an agreement that if she wanted to dance with someone 
else, she would let me know (sometimes I suggested a good dancer to her as 
well), and I would facilitate the exchange by giving the gentleman a chance to 
confer with me first.

This all may seem quite anachronistic and chauvinistic but it worked well 
because it followed the unwritten rules of behavior and eliminated 
any embarrassment or discomfort.


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seek, appreciate, and create beauty
this life is not a rehearsal
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----- Original Message ----
> From: "macfroggy at aol.com" <macfroggy at aol.com>
> To: tango-l at mit.edu
> Sent: Tue, August 31, 2010 1:40:13 PM
> Subject: [Tango-L] social ethical behavior
> 
> 
>  Vince, this is so inaccurate!
> 
> 
>  If the "porteno" is under 30, he  probably goes to practicas where anything 
>goes. 
>
> 
> As a dancer who has  lived and taught tango with my milonguero parter in BsAs 
>for many years, let me  assure you that the codigos are still respected and 
>observed in all of the  traditional milongas. 
>
> 
> In places like La Viruta, where the idea is to  meet someone for 
>extracurricular activities after the milonga and not to dance  beautiful tangos, 
>
>many men are aggressive and assault women at their tables (if  they're lucky 
>enough at La Viruta to have a table) by grabbing their arms and  taking them to 

>the dance floor. This works particularly well with foreigners and  young people 

>who have not learned the codigos.
> 
> But just try this at a  traditional milonga! The guy will be laughed out the  
>door.
> 
> Cherie
> http://tangocherie.blogspot.com
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> I have it on good authority from someone who has returned  and experienced
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> *many* milongas in BsAs that most portenoes do not  use the codes.  In fact
> 
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> they approach women as men do so in  Australia.  And yes, there are sleazes
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> amongst  them.
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> The notions of romantic codes have been lost I  think upon the  modern
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> generation.
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> BTW, it is  Niki, not Nick
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> Vince
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> 
> In  Melbourne
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