[Tango-L] Ghandi and the cabaceo

[Valerie Dark]

Myk,

That's it! It's funny. On my trips to Argentina, I've never once had a
bad dance. At home I can get them a lot. It's just as Myk said. If I
don't respond to a nod from someone at home, he never concludes that I
do, in fact, "get it," and that's precisely WHY I'm not nodding back!
He marches up to me and forces that face-to-face confrontation. Well,
those guys I don't mind saying no to, and usually they hate me after
that and don't come back again. Otherwise, I find it hard to turn down
basically nice guys that come up to me at home.

The only people that ever came up to me in Argentina were either
non-Argentines or lesson hustlers. I said no each time and never
regretted it. I sized up the dancers while I sat and I only every
looked at the ones I liked. I didn't canvass the whole room ready to
dance with just anybody! Sometimes I sat a long time, especially in
the sportier, more trendy milongas, but I didn't care. (Well, maybe a
little.) But I never had one bad dance.

Actually, everything is easier in Argentina.

Valerie

On Wed, Nov 25, 2009 at 6:04 AM, Myk Dowling <politas at gmail.com> wrote:

> Tom and Megan are missing the point of the complaint. Unless cabaceo
> usage is used virtually exclusively, women cannot use it to politely
> _avoid_ dancing with people. This is because men will simply assume the
> lady does not get cabaceo, and walk up to ask. A proportion of people
> using cabaceo is not sufficient for this feature to work. _Everyone_
> needs to be using it, and not using it needs to be commonly accepted as
> being rude or unthinkable.
>
>
> Myk,
> in Canberra
>
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>



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Cryptic Ember - The tango blog of Valerie Dark (my pseudonym)
http://crypticember.blogspot.com