[Tango-L] Invitation and refusal

[Nussbaum, Martin]

I agree with Melina, she nailed this topic. Use the cabaceo, people, it
works, everywhere,  even in America. Its human nature.  The only
exception is where milonga organizers keep it so darn dark you have to
use radar instead of cabaceo to find partners,  which is unfortunately
becoming more common at milongas in the US.   
A person who does not meet your eyes, stares at the floor, turns her
face, or does not smile at you when you pass by, is not  a person you
want to dance with, no matter how good a dancer that person is.  Sure,
if you asked, you might get a yes, out of politeness,  but what good is
that ? It will be a mercy tanda, totally devoid of enthusiasm or
positive energy from that partner.   No thanks.  I am looking to dance
tango, so I need a connection.    I need to see some interest, a sparkle
in her eyes, a slight smile, the porch light is on, someone is home, in
the house.   That is going to be a good tanda. 
   Oh, and I totally understand Jack Dylan's attitude.  If a woman turns
down the invite, whether verbal or cabaceo, in a definitvely cold
manner, such as slowly shaking her head no, why would you ever want to
ask that woman again ? Let her dance with Gary Barn.