[Tango-L] Shocked

[Brick Robbins]

> Date: Thu, 26 Feb 2009 00:18:23 +0000
> From: Jay Rabe <jayrabe at hotmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [Tango-L] Shocked
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
>
> OK, here's a contrary opinion:
> I disagree with the hard rule about teaching at milongas. I believe the "rule" that should
> be focused on is to be respectful of and avoid disrupting other dancers at a milonga.

I believe that Jay has hit the nail on the head. The whole point of
all the codes is to try to encourage an environment that is pleasant
for everyone involved.

The teaching prohibition discourages the problem of unwanted advice
(often bad) being forced upon people (usually followers) and the
problem of couples blocking traffic in the ronda, and of loud
conversation disrupting neighbors. It is not difficult to image a
situation where some instruction might be given where none of the
above problems occur. Say, two good friends, one new to tango, quietly
working in a corner of a large dance floor at the beginning of a
milonga, after the lesson.

The cabeceo allows both men, and women more control over picking
partners. The same with the rule about women verbally asking men. Does
this mean that it is wrong for me to verbally ask a friend next to me
when a Biagi tanda starts, with whom I have enjoyed many Biagi tandas?
Most certainly not.

The same thing with open embrace dancers mixing with close embrace
dancers. If environment is such (large floor, sparse attendance) that
dancers can do their double-flying-gancho-backflips without disrupting
neighbors, and their skill level is high enough that they are actually
able do it without disrupting neighbors, is there a problem?

I think the problems occur because the people without the experience,
skill or care, are the ones who verbally ask women who don't want to
dance with them, teach them on the floor, and do big dramatic
movements while they kick and run into their neighbors.

And it takes all 3: experience, skill & care. I've seen some very
skilled dancers (often teachers) not care enough about their
neighbors, do their big dramatic movements and bump, kick or simply
scare them.

I think I heard it best put at the San Francisco Tango Exchange last year

1) Respect your partner
2) Respect yourself
3) Respect the music
4) Respect the people around you.

Can't we all just get along?