[Tango-L] Ecstasis and Control

[Huck Kennedy]

On Fri, Mar 28, 2008 at 8:00 AM, Valerie Dark <valerie.dark at gmail.com> wrote:
> If I accept an invitation in the
> first place, the presumption is that I'm going to dance the way the
> man wants to dance. That's why I want to watch first and see if I'm
> going to be all right with that. I don't negotiate the embrace when I
> start to dance with him. The negotiation occurred when he looked at
> me, nodded, and I decided whether or not to nod back.

    Brava.  Brilliant stuff.

> I find this a lot more peaceful and easy to deal with than our scene.
> It's a little uncomfortable turning down someone who stands in front
> of me and sticks out his hand. (I HATE that.)

    I DESPISE the whole stick-out-the-arm thing, especially when done
in a blase manner with no accompanying polite verbal invitation.  To
me it looks like the master deigning to take the little poodle out for
a walk, and the poodle is supposed to get all filled with excitement
and wag her little tail in glee because her master has bestowed upon
her such a wonderful privilege.

    It also reminds me of guys in the 1950s who would just pull up
their souped-up car in front of the girl's house with the engine still
idling and honk the horn, expecting her to rush out breathless with
excitement and hop in, thankful that she is lucky enough to have been
chosen to engage in such grovelling behavior in favor of some other
tramp at the high school.

Huck, "I do hope I'm not going too far over the top with this  :-)  "