[Tango-L] Buenos Aires milongas

[Janis Kenyon]

Deby Novitz wrote:

<The milongas here are much different than the U.S.  Here the milongas are
social events.  If you don't dance you can always enjoy the company of your
friends.>

I disagree with you, Deby.  I believe that those who really love to dance
tango go to a milonga to dance.  I usually go to a milonga alone.  I may
share a table with another woman, but we don't talk.  She is there for the
same reason--to dance.  We greet each other and refrain from any
conversation.  It's quite different when you and I share a table.  We
converse.  I'm there to listen to the music whether I dance or not.  I feel
this holds true for the majority.  Even couples rarely talk because they are
there to dance, observe the dancing, and listen to the music.  The noise
level from conversation in the milongas is worse than ever.  There are
people who keep talking while dancing.

The exception: professional teachers who go to be seen in a milonga by
foreigners (i.e., Nino Bien on Thursdays). They are there to socialize
rather than dance.  Afterall, they've been teaching all day and have no need
to dance.

<We cannot ask men to dance.  We can look at them all night long and if they
do not want to accept our invitation they won't, regardless of who we are or
how well we dance.>

If I never make eye contact with a certain man, it's because I do not want
to dance with him.  He knows it and doesn't take it personally.  That's why
the cabeceo works so well.  It requires patience on both our parts.  A man
cannot invite me to dance unless I give him the opportunity.  That's fine
with me.  It's all about how he dances and how he holds me.  I may want to
dance a particular tanda with a certain man, but he has the freedom of
choice.  There will always be another day, another tanda, another milonga.