[Tango-L] Help to find masculinity in tango!

[Victor Bennetts]

Dancers,

Thanks so much for the reply Sergio, which my wife and I both think is spot on. We think the leader and follower enjoy the dance way more when they both relax and accept the roles.

I just want to add a few observations of my own. In Australia there is also a strong macho culture which generally is sport orientated and regards dancing as for 'girls'. I have a lot of friends who are constantly being henpecked by their wives and girlfriends to do ballroom and salsa, mostly on the back of tv shows like 'dancing with the stars'. When I tell them I dance tango and love it they generally look at me as if I am some sort of traitor to the male race. So now I usually say something like 'ok, but in tango its not about learning a whole series of steps, the man improvises the lead (like playing jazz) and the woman must follow as if she is some beautiful instrument you are playing'. Generally I get no more questions about why I might like tango, I just get questions about how I can stand to see my wife dancing with other men :-)So I think if the classes emphasise the roles and the lead and the follow rather than slavishly trying to teach a series of steps (the hated by me 8 step basic) then men usually stick with it at least as much as women.

On the follow I would just add that I don't really like the word 'surrender'. Good following in my opinion is clearly feminine but not submissive. I see leading as a bit like getting up on the bus to offer your seat to a woman or opening a door for a woman. It is something clearly masculine that comes from a different time, but we can still enjoy it today without feeling that the woman is surrendering any part of her freedom. To mark a step is to make a rather beautiful proposal where you are not expecting anything in return other than the satisfaction of seeing the step followed well. The woman might be accepting your invitation, but she is not merely surrendering to you. She does have to trust you but she might be a better dancer than you. She might actually give you some feedback in the way she steps about the speed of the music or that she wants to do some embellishments. The dance just requires that she does that in the context of your invitation. In fact I would say that dancing with a follower who just surrenders to you and gives nothing back is pretty dreary. You need them to step in the context of your lead, but to do it with some intention, resistance, intelligence whatever you want to call it.

Victor Bennetts

-----Original Message-----
From: tango-l-bounces at mit.edu [mailto:tango-l-bounces at mit.edu] On Behalf Of Sergio Vandekier
Sent: Sunday, 30 September 2007 1:41 PM
To: Tango-L List
Subject: [Tango-L] Help to find masculinity in tango!


Igor says:  "I was told that many men trying tango drop it because they think "tango istoo feminine".

Dear Igor not too long ago I was surprised to read in one of your notes that you believed that there are no gender roles in tango.

I do not wish to re-start a hot discussion of tango gender roles but I am not surprised that you are encountering such problems as the ones by you described.

I do not care if you (or anybody) likes to lead or follow or change roles back and forth, I do not care if men dance with men and women dance with women, if women lead or men follow.  This is a free society and anybody should be able to do whatever he likes, but...paradoxically enough IMO, tango is universally accepted and cultivated precisely because in this dance the man is the man and woman is the woman.

This is the way we name the members of the dancing couple. We do not use the words leader or follower. We use the words Man and Woman.  If I wish to follow I will say - " I will be the woman" (not the follower).

The man "marca", "LLeva", (directs takes the woman to places), the woman "sigue" (follows him).

He is masculine, poised, somewhat arrogant, he knows he is in charge, he feels the music, decides to make an artistic interpretation and leads the woman, he protects her, he is attentive to avoid collisions. He has intense, deep communication with her, respects her and gives her time to express herself.

She is feminine, applies her chest against his, like the bird that seeks refuge in his nest, she is attentive to his requests and proposals, she follows the best that she can, convinced that he is in charge, she is protected and has nothing to be afraid of. She surrenders to the embrace and he does the same.

Both work in total harmony and create together a beautiful tango.

The music stops, they remain together for a few seconds and then break apart.

If you teach that there are no gender roles in tango it is natural that many males are going to feel awkward dancing such variation of the dance.

You have to remember that your real character or spiritual persona comes out when you dance tango, as the dance is an expression of your personality.  Those that have strong masculine or feminine traits are going to show them while they dance.   Males won't be able to hide their feminine components and women will not be able to hide their masculine ones either.

So my advise to you is teach tango as it was originally conceived: a dance with definite gender roles.

In my experience men and women apppreciate that aspect of the dance which is present in most dances anyways.

Then allow each persona irrespective of their physical gender to adopt the role that they wish to play at the moment.

Respectfully, Sergio
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