[Tango-L] Mens group practice

[m i l e s]

 >Men are also uncomfortable following because they have little practice
 >with it and are consequently very clumsy. So here you are, a great  
tango
 >dancer in your own right and first time you lead you do everything  
that
 >you've been grousing at beginner's for. That's a dis-incentive for  
some.
 >The sort of awareness you need is very different than when you lead as
 >well as the body sense. Contrary to popular lore, following is gosh  
darn
 >hard work. The biggest limiting factor I'm finding in my tango is that
 >women don't really think there is that much to following and
 >consequently do not try to expand their abilities once they hit their
 >comfort zone.

Ding!  Right on the money.

I've been in foundations classes here in the bay area and in boston,  
where certain MEN will not take me as their follower because I'm a  
guy.  Its not because I'm a bad follower, its the whole GUY-THING.

I completely agree with this assertion that if you lead, you must  
learn to follow.  It makes you better leader...it really does.  As a  
lead you begin to understand exactly what is being asked of you as a  
follower, it also strangely enough allows you the capacity to break  
down the dance in a way that you hadn't seen before and thereby  
produce some amazing figures as a lead.  You begin to see  
opportunities everywhere instead of putting your feet where they're  
'supposed' to be, you begin to experiment and play and create.  Its  
actually quite freeing in more ways than you can imagine possible.

Tango from the lead side of things can be very mentally arduous.  But  
its a whole different angle when you add on top of that the level of  
work that a follower has to go through in order to do what you just  
'suggested' she do for you.  I say suggested because it is a  
suggestion, because in the few short months that I've been actively  
following, I've learned that I've become a better leader because I  
know exactly what I'm asking my follower to do, because I've done it  
myself.  Its improved my embrace, its improved my communication  
skills, its opened opportunities.  I can't stress this enough...leads  
- LEARN HOW TO FOLLOW!  You'll begin to understand just how frakkin  
hard it is to do what some neophyte or experienced lead with an over  
inflated ego who knows nothing of what its like to follow is asking  
of you.  And being rather brutish about it.  Yes you will look stupid  
at first, but you'll get better.  And then you'll begin to appreciate  
the better leads in the room.  It will change your dance.  I know a  
lead here in the bay area that changed his whole M.O. after going to  
a men's practica, and now you see him taking foundations classes as a  
follower all the time.  Well I see it.  He's actually getting better  
as a lead and a follower...and I've heard women say the same thing  
about it.

The same thing for followers....LEARN HOW TO LEAD.  It will get rid  
of those nasty habits that every lead has been yapping at you about  
for the last X number of years!  At the same time it will improve  
your abilities in so many areas.  You'll finally get that whole 'on  
the beat' thing. Why its important to keep your embellishments clear,  
small and not to go wild on your dance partner.  And that's just the  
tip of the iceberg.  It will also open up a world of dance partners  
for you, instead of sitting all night long, change your shoes and  
become a leader and get to dancing! Talk about a wild ride!

Just my .43 cents worth.

Oooops, there I go again, I'm in your inbox...again  Sorry about that.

M i l e s.