[Tango-L] Acrimoniousness and the red herring of moderation

[Carol Shepherd]

Apparently the answer to Miles' query is that for some reason, in the 
online tango community, the dominant players generate and consume poison 
and unpleasantness as a form of entertainment.

They expect others to be wired the same way.  They feed on provocation 
and conflict and if it is not there in sufficient quantity, they will 
stir the pot.  They engage in display behavior by acting out their 
dominance and they award themselves self esteem points through bullying. 
  These self-esteem points are very easily obtained because everyone is 
remote and there are no social consequences to bullying or other bad 
behavior.

Accordingly, on tango-l there is no consensus (as there is generally in 
polite society) that to be acrimonious and impose your unpleasantness on 
others is morally wrong or stressful on a community, or even bad for 
your karma or your blood pressure.  To the contrary, it is celebrated. 
The community does not want a moderator because the community does not 
want to lose its primary form of entertainment.

It is unfortunate that the highest and most intellectual discussion of a 
particular human endeavor (tango) to be found, as on this list, requires 
subjecting oneself to the petty amusements of others who take their 
entertainment primarily in the form of bullying others, and who justify 
their mean and uncivilized behavior by claiming that it is actually a 
necessary expression of "passion and intensity."

When in Rome, be aware that Romans are going to continue being Romans.

This does not mean that you must be a Roman.

'Mash wrote:
> I look forward to the day that we can use "flame wars" as a sustainable energy source. 
> 
> 'Mash
> London,UK
> 
> "May we be cautious in our perfection lest we lose the ability to dance."
> 
> 
> On Wed, Jul 18, 2007 at 02:28:11PM -0600, Nina Pesochinsky wrote:
> 
>>Amaury,
>>
>>On the tango lists, there are only two choices - you either die or be 
>>killed, or grow thick skin.  Welcome to the list1
>>
>>Nina
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>At 02:16 PM 7/18/2007, Amaury de Siqueira wrote:
>>
>>>My first experience with list moderation date as far
>>>back as 1993-4 with the
>>>KMUG (Kansai Mac Users Group) list.  At the end of the
>>>day moderation was as
>>>detrimental to the list as non-moderation.
>>>
>>>One of the rationales behind list moderation is
>>>sustenance of an online
>>>community.  Implicit in this argument is the idea that
>>>constant disruption
>>>and flame war is likely to push certain members to
>>>leave the community thus
>>>eroding the quality of membership and content of
>>>postings.
>>>
>>>The bottom line for me is the 'age' of a list.  That
>>>is, an old established
>>>list with strong membership and displaying high
>>>quality posting may not be
>>>susceptible to the eroding effects of flame and
>>>disruption.  It seems to me
>>>that this list's quality FAR exceed the once in a
>>>while virulent posting of
>>>some listeras. ;)
>>>
>>>Some flames evolve into rich discussion and edifying
>>>exchanges.  Nina's
>>>abhorrent posting is a good case in point.  I learned
>>>as a result of an
>>>initial nonsensical posting - (thank you to
>>>Konstantin, Huck, and all
>>>others)
>>>
>>>A censored list may strip the list of its richness of
>>>expression.  Granted
>>>we should all try to display certain level of
>>>civility.   However, I must
>>>say that the entertainment value of some postings
>>>bring a smile to my face.
>>>That alone makes it all worthwhile.
>>>
>>>Cheers,
>>>Amaury
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>From: tango-l-bounces at mit.edu
>>>[mailto:tango-l-bounces at mit.edu] On Behalf Of
>>>m i l e s
>>>Sent: Wednesday, July 18, 2007 3:11 PM
>>>To: tango-l at mit.edu
>>>Subject: [Tango-L] A Cautionary Phrase (was:
>>>Acrimoniousness)
>>>
>>>Hi,
>>>
>>>After reading everyones responses my post about
>>>Acrimoniousness...
>>>
>>>"You can tell a fool he's doing a foolish thing, it
>>>may not change
>>>anything, but at least the truth is where it needs to
>>>be". - Kosh,
>>>Vorlon Ambassador, Babylon 5.
>>>
>>>Oh and one thing about list moderation, the list
>>>moderator in my
>>>estimation in question isn't doing a good job of list
>>>moderation if
>>>they're acting like that.  A good list moderator,
>>>shepherds the
>>>conversation and doesn't stifle it!  That's a rare
>>>skill and not
>>>everyone is cut out for it, so its wise when starting
>>>a list to pick
>>>someone ELSE other than yourself to moderate a list.
>>>
>>>Lastly, I find it interesting that you folks took the
>>>better portion
>>>of my note and discarded it in favor of focusing on
>>>the one thing
>>>that was an after thought, the list moderation.  As a
>>>friend of mine
>>>once said, "People are gonna do what they're gonna do,
>>>and you can't
>>>change that.  But you can influence them by how you
>>>carry yourself."
>>>
>>>M i l e s.
>>>_______________________________________________
>>>Tango-L mailing list
>>>Tango-L at mit.edu
>>>http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>____________________________________________________________________________________
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>>>_______________________________________________
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>>
>>
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> 
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