[Tango-L] Dancing with a broom

[Norman Tiber]

At the risk of “enabling” postings about women as “metaphors,” I do  
have to admit that I have been guilty of using the “women as a broom”  
image.

I have done this when describing the qualities that I look for in a  
dance partner, including my favorite partner, my wife Anne, in  
certain aspects of the Tango.

I do not want to dance with brooms, violins, etc. etc. etc. at Milongas.

At a workshop/practica, when I am trying to work out my lead on some  
new technique or step, I do appreciate it if my partner can tolerate  
being pushed and shoved  around the floor like a broom. I try to do  
this gently and move from a practice hold to close embrace as I gain  
some mastery.

Initially, I want my partner to be silent while I am working out my  
“cognitive map” of what I am trying to lead. But as I progress,  
feedback from my partner about what she is experiencing, what is  
working, what is not, suggestions to help me with my lead are  
essential. For me, this works much better than using two broom sticks.

I have been a student of Argentine Tango for about three and a half  
years. Some women have a zero broom tolerance. I respect this and,  
given my learning style, try not to impose my “broom” needs on them.  
My wife has about a ten minute broom tolerance and I try to limit our  
practicas, when I am in the “I don’t know what I’m trying to lead  
mode,” to no more than ten minutes.

Now I must admit that I have benefited from the weeks of discussion  
on Tango L about women as a metaphor. Everyone in my Tango community  
knows about my need for “broom tolerance” from my workshop/practica  
partners. But for the New Year, I am taking a resolution to switch  
from a “broom” to a “Stradivarius” metaphor. Any woman who can  
tolerate my pushing and shoving her around the floor is as special as  
a Stradivarius, whose exceptional qualities I appreciate to the fullest!

Wishing all a New Year filled with Tango and peace!

Norm