[Tango-L] He played her like a violin

[Keith]

I agree with Carol.

There are some things more important that Tango and one of them is how 
men think about and talk about women in general. Referring to a woman as 
an object, even indirectly, is unacceptable. Think of her in that way and 
it's only a short step to treating her in the same way. If men do that 
while dancing Tango - shame on you. 

Keith, HK


On Sat Dec 22  3:04 , Carol Shepherd  sent:

>Men may be from Mars, or they may be from The Planet Where They Can Be 
>Really Offensive and Still Get Lots of Dance Partners.
>
>We all have our way of saying things and thinking about things.  For all 
>I know the dude I'm dancing with is mentally cutting me up into sirloins 
>like Hannibal Lecter.  He could be thinking any number of other 
>disturbing and upsetting things that would offend my sensibilities if I 
>only knew.  As long as I don't know, and it's not in my face, it can't 
>bother me.
>
>I certainly would go out of my way to avoid dancing with a man who 
>objectified women with florid platitudes like "I played so-and-so like a 
>violin" or "the follow is a brush with which I paint the canvas of the 
>floor."  I've danced with lots of male dancers who talk like that about 
>themselves--yes, that's what they are doing, they are talking about 
>themselves.  In my experience, they are also mainly dancing with 
>themselves.  I just happen to be there for the duration of the song. 
>Not my definition of good social dancing.
>
>Whichever way one's sympathies may lie in this matter, I would observe 
>that this particular way of talking about tango does indeed seem to 
>upset lots of women, they do not like the idea that a women is an OBJECT 
>with which a man expresses himself artistically.
>
>So, depending on how full a leader's dance card is, it might be better 
>not to advertise this way of thinking and offend a lot of follows.
>
>Tango For Her wrote:
>> Damn!  Well put!  I think everyone's comments where stated well for their viewpoints.  But, I have to say, THIS is poetic!
>>   
>> 
>> Jay Rabe jayrabe at hotmail.com> wrote:
>>   Men are from Mars. They speak a different language. 
>> 
>> When a man says, "He played her like a violin...," what he means is, "He expresses his musicality by leading her steps to accompany 
the music so harmoniously that her feet could be a part of the orchestra. He pauses to give her space to embellish at exactly those 
points in the musical score where such embellishments fit perfectly with the music, as if she were part of the orchestra." 
>> 
>> I dare say, it's highly likely that the woman who was dancing with the man so described would have reported a sublime experience of 
exquisite musicality.
>> 
>> 
>> 
>> 
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>
>-- 
>Carol Ruth Shepherd
>Arborlaw PLC
>Ann Arbor MI USA
>734 668 4646 v  734 786 1241 f
>Arborlaw - a legal blog for entrepreneurs and small business
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