[Tango-L] He played her like a violin

[Carol Shepherd]

Men may be from Mars, or they may be from The Planet Where They Can Be 
Really Offensive and Still Get Lots of Dance Partners.

We all have our way of saying things and thinking about things.  For all 
I know the dude I'm dancing with is mentally cutting me up into sirloins 
like Hannibal Lecter.  He could be thinking any number of other 
disturbing and upsetting things that would offend my sensibilities if I 
only knew.  As long as I don't know, and it's not in my face, it can't 
bother me.

I certainly would go out of my way to avoid dancing with a man who 
objectified women with florid platitudes like "I played so-and-so like a 
violin" or "the follow is a brush with which I paint the canvas of the 
floor."  I've danced with lots of male dancers who talk like that about 
themselves--yes, that's what they are doing, they are talking about 
themselves.  In my experience, they are also mainly dancing with 
themselves.  I just happen to be there for the duration of the song. 
Not my definition of good social dancing.

Whichever way one's sympathies may lie in this matter, I would observe 
that this particular way of talking about tango does indeed seem to 
upset lots of women, they do not like the idea that a women is an OBJECT 
with which a man expresses himself artistically.

So, depending on how full a leader's dance card is, it might be better 
not to advertise this way of thinking and offend a lot of follows.

Tango For Her wrote:
> Damn!  Well put!  I think everyone's comments where stated well for their viewpoints.  But, I have to say, THIS is poetic!
>   
> 
> Jay Rabe <jayrabe at hotmail.com> wrote:
>   Men are from Mars. They speak a different language. 
> 
> When a man says, "He played her like a violin...," what he means is, "He expresses his musicality by leading her steps to accompany the music so harmoniously that her feet could be a part of the orchestra. He pauses to give her space to embellish at exactly those points in the musical score where such embellishments fit perfectly with the music, as if she were part of the orchestra." 
> 
> I dare say, it's highly likely that the woman who was dancing with the man so described would have reported a sublime experience of exquisite musicality.
> 
> 
> 
> 
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-- 
Carol Ruth Shepherd
Arborlaw PLC
Ann Arbor MI USA
734 668 4646 v  734 786 1241 f
Arborlaw - a legal blog for entrepreneurs and small business
http://arborlaw.com