[Tango-L] Leading and following

[Sergio Vandekier]

Razor Girl says:

                     "I would like to remind
leaders that a woman always has a choice whether to
follow what you lead, and how to follow it.  There is
nothing you can lead without her consent.  The very
best you can do is to make requests....that is the
essence of good leading."

I agree with the above but, I invite a girl to dance tango. I "lead" her 
(for instance)
to step side with her right.
She refuses,  (this has never happened to me so far), then what do we do?

I "suggest" that she steps backwards with her left so that I step forward 
with my right, she refuses.
(this has never happened to me so far).
then what do we do?

I "invite" her to cross her left foot back in a back ocho. She refuses, then 
what do we do?

At this point should I take her back to her seat? or perhaps should I ask 
what is the problem? as I get out of the line of dance.

Are you able to walk? can I do something for you? to see if you can step in 
any direction?

I am really interested in knowing the meaning of all this because to tell 
you the truth I never so a woman to refuse to follow a lead so far. I wonder 
if the vocabulary utilized (suggest, invite, instead of lead) is out of 
courtesy so that the follower feel better or if it really it has some other 
meaning.

I assume that we are talking about normal people that know how to dance 
properly.

Best regards, Sergio

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