[LCM Articles] Fwd: "Siege notes" by rasha salti

[Philippe Charles Saad]

It is long, but worth reading all the way.
It is a intellectual, precise, humane letter that shows anger, patriotism,
despair, disgust, solidarity, outrage, helplessness
all what a single human mind can go through in few minutes!



"Siege notes" by rasha salti


  (Dear All,
The generator shut down before I could end this entry. It's noon the
next day now...)

Dear All,

I am drafting this entry in this unusual diary at 11:30 pm, I have
about half an hour before the generator shuts down. Most of Beirut
is in the dark. I dare not imagine what the country is like. Today
was a relatively calm day, but like most calm days that come
immediately after tumultuous days, it was a sinister day of taking
stock of damage, pulling bodies from under destroyed buildings,
shuttling injured to hospitals that have the capacity to tend to
their wounds more adequately.
The relative calm allowed journalists to visit the sites of shelling
and violence. The images from Tyre, and villages in the south are
shocking. Images from Haret Hreyk (the neighborhood in the southern
suburb that received the most "focused" shelling) are also
astounding.
The number of deaths is yet uncertain, it increases by the hour as
bodies are pulled from the landscape of destruction. In the
southern suburbs, some people may be trapped in underground
shelters under the vestiges of their homes and apartment buildings.
And yes, there is a problem of space in morgues in the south and the
Beqaa, because none of the towns and villages are equipped to handle
these numbers of deaths.
The IDF has destroyed almost entirely the village of 'Aytaroun. Some
of the surviving wounded are Canadian citizens. Like the 8 Canadians
who died in the building in Tyre (a building that housed the red
cross and civil rescue), the Canadian government has had very
little regard for them.

Evacuations, Privilege, Solidarity
Today was a particularly strange day for me because I was granted an
opportunity to leave tomorrow morning. I hold a Canadian passport, I
was born in Toronto when my parents were students there. I left at
age two. I have never gone back, for lack of opportunity and
occasion, no other reason. I have the choice to sign up for the
evacuation, but the European and North American governments have
been so despicable, so racist that I don't want to subject myself
to a discrimination of that sort. The Swedes, the Danes and the
Germans have evacuated their patriots with blond hair and blue
eyes. The immigrants that were given shelter to their countries
"out of the kindness" of their governments have been systematically
left behind; and the guest workers who stayed to enliven their
economies and their babies who adjust the dynamism of their
demographies, were left behind to fend for shelter under the
shells. But I digress. The point I set out to make is that I refuse
to be evacuated as a second tier denizen.
I had the opportunity to leave tomorrow by car to Syria, then to
Jordan and from there by plane to wherever I am supposed to be
right now. For days I have been itching to leave because I want to
pursue my professional commitments, meet deadlines and continue
with my life. For days I have been battling ambivalence towards
this war, estranged from the passions it has roused around me and
from engagement in a cause. And yet when the phone call came
informing me that I had to be ready at 7:00 am the next morning, I
asked for a pause to think. I was torn. The landscape of the human
and physical ravages of Israel's genial strategy at implementing UN
Resolution 1559, the depth of destruction, the toll of nearly 250
deaths, more than 800 injured and 400,000 displaced, had bound me
to a sense of duty. It was not even patriotism, it was actually the
will to defy Israel. They cannot do this and drive me away. They
will not drive me away.
This is one of the most recurring mistakes that the IDF makes, this
is how we see things: THEY have destroyed this country, THEY are
taking an opportunity to turn it to rubble and to usher us into
oblivion, if there is ambivalence vis-a-vis the wisdom of
Hezbollah's capture of the two soldiers, there is unambiguous,
unanimous solidarity to stand in the face of Israel's barbaric
arrogance. Some people see more in this war, some people see a
moment of where the logic/values of the policies of the Moubaraks,
the Abdullahs of the Arab world, i.e. the defeatist, pragmatic
corrupt sell-outs will be humiliated as well. And I am sure, other
people see other things as well.

The roads to Damascus are not safe. Its many different ways are
shelled everyday. Drivers know what "calculated" risks to take, I
am assured, but one never knows. Everyday the way out becomes more
difficult. I decided to stay, I don't know when I will have another
opportunity to leave.
The first contingent of Britons was evacuated early this evening.
There are two ships, but the evacuation will take place over 3
days. Same for the French and Americans, their evacuations will
last for 2 days. While the evacuations are taking place, there was
relative quiet. A welcome lull. There was activity in the street,
even on the Corniche along the seaside. Refugees from the south,
displaced from their homes and provided shelter in public schools
strolled in Hamra, looking for a breath of fresh air. A break from
the confinement in schools and other makeshift shelters.
Imagine the horror, the sad, sad horror: we are on borrowed time and
the only reason we are not under threat, under any serious threat is
because the passport holders of some of the G8 countries are
evacuating safely to safer harbors. With this relative calm, the
sense of impending doom becomes almost palpable, time, space, light
and movement are subsumed in an eerie stillness. It feels vaporous
and fills the air. As it wafts from room to room, from apartment to
apartment, as it turns a corner and moves to another neighborhood,
every gesture, every act is a little delayed, slowed,
surreptitiously lethargic, every thought lingers too long in the
unfinished or inchoate state. This eerie stillness numbs the
passage of time and the cognitive perception of things material.
Objects seem both familiar and unfamiliar. They are familiar in
that they were there the day before and seem not to have moved from
their place. They are unfamiliar because they seem to belong to
another time, another life. There was another life, I had another
life that seems distant and foreign now. The morning is different,
noon is different, sunset is different. Another Beirut has emerged.
War time Beirut. War time Lebanon. War time mornings, war time
noons. Siege time Beirut, siege time morning, siege time sunsets.
Everyone else in the world is going about their day as they had
planned it or as it was planned for them. The shakers and movers of
this world, the fledgling middle classes of the developping world,
the 11 million children workers in India, the good-doers and the
evil-doers. We are in a different geography of time, of agency, we
are besieged, captive, hostage. No chance of Stockholm syndrome
this time. Our every move is monitored: every moving vehicle
delivering food, fuel, or medicines is monitored, every phone call
is listened on, every email read, every dream snarled at, every
desire crushed. Israel has the right to explode it to smithereens.
The shelling has not really let, don't get me wrong. It still goes
on but it's more occasional, there are more "blank spaces" in
between now.

Hezbollah
These "siege notes" have been receiving a number of reponses from
Israelis. I have to say that most are of the annoying sort. First,
they always begin by noting that I am intelligent and I get
commended for my intelligence like Colin Powell gets commended for
his English language speaking skills and you wonder what those
making these observations expect from you and the world in the
first place. Second, they systematically mistake _expression of
dissent and critique with Arab regimes and official discourse as
some sort of a favorable disposition towards Israel. In other words
there is, falsely, a tautology between regarding Israel as an enemy
country and endorsing radical ideologies of Islamic fundamentalism
or rabid nationalism. As if being a democrat, an egalitarian and a
feminist implied that one could not have even more profound grounds
for being critical of Israel and regarding that country as an enemy
country that has sponsored and produced nothing but war, violence,
wretchedness, misery, banditry and usurpation. And so heartened by
my ambivalence towards this war they recommend that more
conversations should take place between Israelis and I. Off course
most propose that I make the effort to seek those Israeli
interlocutors out. This extreme form of Habermas-mania, that
assumes that deep conflicts can be "talked through" is the sumum of
hubris. The experience of the peace process is telling: it is clear
that Israelis cannot cannot cannot accept Palestinians as human
beings whose humanity is of equal value as their own. This is the
bottom line. And until that bottom line is changed, there is
nothing that a member of a society that builds walls around itself
to shut itself off from the world and shut the world from itself
can tell me. Punto final.
One of my impromptu (Israeli) commentators warned of my candor,
despaired at my position vis-a-vis Israel, and took generously time
and space to explain to me that Hezbollah he/she must be crushed
because if they were to win, they would destroy Israel and me,
because of my values and lifestyle. This view, along with other
views salient in western media (particularly American) of Hezbollah
betrays ignorance. It is fatal ignorance.
The most gross miscalculation Israeli strategists are making is
based on the assumption that Hezbollah is a) not a legitimate
political entity in this country, b) its base is made up of
extremists and c) its "elimination" would leave the Lebanese
construct unscathed. In point of fact, pushing the Lebanese
population to "rise up" against Hezbollah, or the scenario of a
Lebanese implosion is the worst case scenario for all regional
"parties", because the country would then become the jungle of
violence and killing that Iraq is today.
Because I am a staunch secular democrat, I have never endorsed
Hezbollah, but I do not question their legitimacy as a political
actor on the Lebanese scene, I believe they are just as much a
product of Lebanon's contemporary history, its war and postwar as
are all other parties. If one were to evaluate the situation in
vulgar sectarian terms, when it comes to representing the interests
of their constituency they certainly do a better job than all the
political representatives presently and in the past.
It would be utter folly (in fact it would be murderous folly) to
regard Hezbollah as another radical Islamist terrorist
organization, at least in the ideological and idiomatic vein of the
American intelligentsia and punditry. (There is something about a
stubborness to misunderstand that betrays an intent to see a crisis
linger or even escalate in the US. If Americans feel better being
misguided idiots, Israelis should know better. If the Israeli
intelligentsia wants to play deaf like Americans the only outcome
will be an Iraq scenario, although I reiterate that Lebanon is not
Iraq and the Lebanese are not and will not be Iraqi and will not be
manipulated into the barbaric sectarian horror. We've tried that
before and it does not work, and we are tired of fighting each
other.)
Hezbollah is a mature political organization (that has matured
organically within the evolution of Lebanese politics) with an
Islamist ideology, that has learned (very quickly) to co-exist with
other political agents in this country, as well as other sects. If
Lebanese politics was a representation of short-sighted petty
sectarian calculations, the lived social experience of postwar
Lebanon was different. Sectarian segregation was extremely
difficult to implement in the conduct of everyday social
transactions, in the conduct of business, employment and all other
avenues of commonplace life. And that is a capital we all carry
within ourselves, there are exceptional moments when the country
came together willingly and spontaneously (as with the Israeli
attacks in 1993 and 1996), but there are other smaller, less
spectacular moments that punctuate the lived experience of the
postwar that every single Lebanese can recall where sectarian
prejudice was utterly meaningless, experienced as meaningless.
When former Prime Minister Rafiq Hariri was assassinated, the
country seemed divided into two camps, the consensus was
overwhelming however that we will not revert to fighting one
another, to eliminating one another.
If Israel plans to annihilate Hezbollah, it will annihilate Lebanon.
Hezbollah and its constituency are not only Lebanese in the
perception of all, they are also a key, essential element of
contemporary Lebanon. Moreover the specifics of UN Resolution 1559
may have regional implications, but at heart and in essence they
can only be resolved within the Lebanese consensus. Israel CANNOT
take it upon itself to implement that UN resolution. There is off
course sinister folly that Israel should implement any UN
resolution considering its stellar record of snarling, snickering
and shrugging at every single UN resolution that did not suit its
sensibilities.
Hezbollah are not al-Qaeda, Israeli and US propaganda will portray
them as much, and that is the downfall of public opinion, that is
the tragedy at the root of the consensus that agrees to watching
Lebanon burn. In more ways than can be counted they are different
political ideologies, groups and movements. First, they are not
suicidal. Second, they are not anti-historical. Third, they are a
full-fledged political agent at the center of a dynamic polity.
Their ideology is not an ideology of doom, they represent as much
petty interests of their constituency as they are imbricated in the
fabric of regional politics.

Israel, and Channel 2
I was watching Lise Doucet on the BBC interview one of Olmert's
underlings yesterday after the speech. This is the folly of the
Israelis, and I believe it will be their downfall, ultimately. He
was lamenting that Hezbollah hit the "peaceful" city of Haifa, an
Israeli city that he described as exemplar of coexistence between
Jews, Christians and Muslims. Haifa! An Israeli city? Haifa? The
name is Arabic. The jewel in the crown of Palestinian cities... A
peaceful haven of coexistence between Jews, Muslims and Christians?
My God! It took DECADES for Christians and Muslims to appear on the
roster of "human beings" in the ledgers of the Israeli government.
Decades of struggle, riots, pain and suffering. And they are still
second class citizen, and they are still unwelcome, pushed out, day
after day, crushed by the Israeli machine.
This eloquent underling was making the argument that Hezbollah
wanted to destroy the city of "coexistence". Off course, he does
not care that the city the IDF has currently under siege, the city
they are bombing to rubble, the city where the red cross and civil
rescue headquarters were shelled to the ground, Tyre, is itself a
gorgeous jewel on the Lebanese coast. That it is a GENUINE city of
coexistence amongst Christians, Shi'ites and Sunnis. And the
delightful town of Marja'yun is also a city where sects and
religions co-exist, and Zahleh... and so on and so forth... But no
matter, the Israelis have always done this, and eventually, it
catches up with them, and in the end, they realize that their
narrative is so far removed from reality they have to back track.
The key to understanding Israeli's relationship to our humanity
lies in a text by David Grossman, one of Israel's foremost
novelists, essayists and writers. He wrote it around the time of
the First Intifada. Israel was then beginning to come into
reckoning that the occupation of the West Bank and Gaza was no
longer tenable or sound strategy for the well-being of its
democracy.

By the second or third of these "siege notes", the emails reached
Israel and Israeli blogs. A journalist from Israel's Channel 2
contacted me by email and asked for an interview. I was
uncomfortable with the idea at first, for fear that my words be
distorted and my genuine, candid sentiments quoted to serve
arguments I do not endorse. Exposing oneself with transparency has
its charm and price. That journalist seems like a nice person, but
I have no reason to trust her and she understands my misgivings. My
only defense is transparency. She sent me the set of questions below
for me to answer so she can air them on TV or use them for some
report. I decided to share them with you all.

1. How your day looks like from the morning.  What you did today?
did you have coffee? how do you get the news - television? radio?
internet?
The routine of our days is totally changed. We now live under a
regimen of survival under siege. Those of us still not wounded and
not stranded do whatever needs to be done to survive until the next
day. Coffee, yes, I have coffee in the morning, and at noon and in
the afternoon. Perhaps I have too much coffee. The passage of time
is all about monitoring news, checking everyone's OK, and figuring
out what has to be done to help those in distress. News are on all
the time. All the time, whatever media works.
There is a great need for volunteers to tend to the hundreds of
thousands displaced now.

2. Can you describe the neighborhood you live in?
So it will be bombed? No thank you. I live in a very, very
privileged neighborhood, far from the southern suburbs. After the
evacuation of foreign nationals (and bi-nationals) is complete,
everyone is expecting doom and if Israelis decide to give us a dose
of tough love as they did in the southern suburbs my life will
probably be in serious danger as my family's and everyone who has
decided to stay here.

3. Can you say something about yourself - like what you do for
living, if you can say.
I organize cultural events and I am a free-lance writer. I used to
live in New York city and moved to Beirut Tuesday July 11th. I have
no life at the present moment. I try to do a few things over the
internet, but that's increasingly difficult.

4. Are you Lebanese or Palestinian?
Both and it gets more complicated I have Syrian blood too. And
Turkish and Bosnian. I am the product of the Ottoman empire, and I
say it with pride. I know it ires a lot of people. But I am VERY
proud to claim my lineage. My father was expelled from Jerusalem in
1948, he and his family lived in a gorgeous home in Talbiyeh. I
think it is a day care school now. We own property in old Jerusalem
as well and the Atlantic Hotel which was bombed by your "valiant"
paramilitary pre-national militias in 1946.

5. In Israel our leaders think that by targeting Hezbollah and other
places in Lebanon will make the rest of the local population against
them. Is this true?
It is pure folly, but even if it were true it is a terrible
strategy, an imploded Lebanon is a nightmare to all, not only the
Lebanese but to everyone, does Israel want an Iraq at its doorstep?
There seems to be consensus now in Israel over the military
campaign. It is because Israelis are not yet pressing their
leadership and military the smart questions. Do you actually
believe it would be possible to eliminate the Shi'i sect from
Lebanon, and that it would go down easy in the region? If the
Americans are advising you, duck for cover or move. Need I list
their record of wisdom and foresight recently? Vietnam, Central
America, Somalia, Afghanistan, Iraq. If you need to listen to
imperialists, find less idiotic ones, at least who have a sense of
history. Gold help us all if Rumsfeld is also in charge of your
well-being. This war will bring doom to all. Stop, cut everybody's
losses. Wars can be stopped before the body count is "intolerable"
or an entire country has been reduced to rubble.

6. What is the atmosphere in the streets of Beirut, if you can tell.
Beirut is quiet, dormant, huddled. We are caged, but there is
tenacious solidarity. You have to understand that we see ourselves
under an unwarranted attack from Israel. The capture of two
soldiers DOES NOT justify Israel's response. There has been a
status quo for the past 6 years that was well managed. Hezbollah
was not in an impasse, the Olmert government was in an impasse. He
ran on a campaign to solidify the "new" (illegitimate) borders,
finish the wall and finalize the enclave and withdraw into the
boundaries of that enclave. The Olmert government did not have the
maturity or intelligence to know how to deal with the Hamas
government. Your government was guided by arrogance. We, you and
us, are here today because your political class is not up to the
challenge. I am sorry, but the Hamas government was elected
democratically, and there were myriad ways to deal with them.
MYRIAD. But this is the stage of your destiny that you have
reached, you build walls around yourselves (you to whom the Massada
is a foundational trauma/myth!), and you chase barefoot, toohtless,
illiterate, hungry people with state of the art military arsenal.
And you insist that you are victims, and you insist that you are on
the right side of history. All this bulllshit will catch up with
you.

7. What is the atmosphere among your friends?
The consensus is solidarity. Our country is under attack. Otherwise,
we are an exceedingly plural society every one has a theory and a
point of view, and we co-exist. Humoring one another. What do you
do when you are under siege? Do you eat one another, cannibalize on
one another, or stand in solidarity to weather the storm?

8. Can you go to work, or do you have to stay home? (because some of
the workers in the north of Israel did not go to work today)
The largest, largest majority do not go to work. Although it is a
form of resilience. If the war goes on for longer, life will have
to evolve a different routine. A large part of the work force is
impaired from movement. And then there is the random shelling, it's
also dangerous to go out. This has gone on from the first day of the
siege. The south is now sinking in a humanitarian crisis. Beirut
will soon.
(The new regulation by your glorious IDF this morning is to shoot at
all moving vehicles larger than SUVs. One was just shelled in
Ashrafieh. New danger, new things to look out for.)

9. Whatever crosses your mind.
Let's not go there... It's dark now, and I am too traumatized. I
just want this to be over. I am waiting for a ceasefire. Are you?
Is that too unmanly for your society? What do you need to see
before you cease your fire? You want to hear me expire? You take
down Hezbollah, and I am going down with them. Do you know when
Hezbollah was born? 1982. Where were you? Was it an exciting summer
for you?

10. I, for example, went to my gym class this morning. I am at home
now, listening to the radio on one side, writing mails on the other
side. Air-condition is on, since it is extremely hot and humid in
Tel Aviv. I live in the center of the city. Later I will go to the
office. I think life in my city continues but in a lower volume.
Life as it were, or as previously understood, in my city has
stopped. No gym classes, and I am accumulating cellulite, hence
chances of finding second husband are lessened (can I make the IDF
pay for that?). Air-conditioning is dependent on electricity or
generator working. Power cuts are the rule now and the generator
works only on a schedule. I like it when Israelis report their
weather, it ought to have some cathartic virtue, because it's like
a reality check one of the few reminders they are in this region
and not in Europe. So yes, without air-conditioning and with power
cuts, my "semitic" curls produce unruly coiffe and I have to admit,
I am enduring siege with bad hair.
I am on email, but that's intermittant between two bouts of
"breaking news".

I hope you will wake up to the nightmare you have dragged us into. I
hope you will want to have fire ceased as soon as possible. I hope
you will deem our humanity as valuable as your own.

Best, Rasha.
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