[Tango-L] Skilled women [was: buenos aires milongas]

[Victor Bennetts]

Its not unusual for a follower to do something you don't expect. I try not to put it down to either poor leading or poor following, but it doesn't make me give up or not want to dance with a particular follower. They all have their good points :-), but some followers just need a little more assistance with certain steps than others. If I don't have the skills to give them more assistance then that is something I would need to work on.

So generally if something has not worked I just lead the same step again, but a little more firmly. And if it still doesn't work maybe a third time. If it doesn't work at that stage then there are two possibilities. The follower may have a certain way of doing a certain step. You can still have a nice dance if you just lead that one step the way the follower is expecting. But I find that pretty rare. In my experience usually the problem is I only led a particular step with people 'expecting' it before. In that case I get help from a more experienced dancer.

Victor Bennetts


-----Original Message-----
From: tango-l-bounces at mit.edu [mailto:tango-l-bounces at mit.edu] On Behalf Of Keith
Sent: Friday, 12 October 2007 3:50 AM
To: tango-l at mit.edu
Subject: Re: [Tango-L] Skilled women [was: buenos aires milongas]

Of course, Jeff, I'm sure the reason couldn't possibly be your poor leading.
Personally, I've never had a woman ... "automatically resolve into an ocho".
If you want something different, Jeff, lead something different. And if you
can't - don't blame the woman.

Keith, HK


On Thu Oct 11 22:05 , Jeff Gaynor  sent:

>I actually don't really know many figures at all. I am referring to attempting
>to get, e.g., a clockwise turn that the woman doesn't automatically resolve
>into an ocho. Heck last week I had one so bad I actually tried letting go of
>her in the middle of it and she *still* did a solo ocho. I could have been
>across the room for all I could influence her.
>
>How do you politely indicate to
>someone like that they need to actually pay attention to the lead for a
>change? Women talk about a man's delicate ego but forget they have one too.
>I see tango as an interaction: I offer something and then follow how she resolves it.
>If there are only a couple of resolutions women seem to know or at least bother practicing
>up to any level of fluency, what to do?  I'm starting to think like Manuel and just avoid
>certain women on the floor.
>
>Jeff G
>
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