[Tango-L] Multi-tasking

[Melanie Eskoff]

Keith, the Stephen Colbert image was delicious.  Thanks.

The notion that men are all one kind of person and women are all another is so bizarre and false.  This Texan will let the Argentines be Argentine and not worry about them.  They are as diverse as any people on earth in spite of what a few on this list, even those living in BA think.  There are plenty of Argentines who don't have a problem with women leading, but they've probably been corrupted by evil liberated Norte Americanos and Europeans.  Some people apparently feel that Tango can only mean one think and contain one kind of dynamic between a man and a woman.  This sounds very much like the current fundamentalist religious dogma circulating in this country.  I feel sorry for people with this limited outlook.

The fact that I lead in no way affect my ability to follow.  It enhances it.  The idea that knowing half of the dance is better than know the whole dance is absurd.  Some people can multi-task better than others.  If you can't.....dont.  If someone is lucky or hardworking enough to speak  more than one language, would you ever tell them to stop speaking one so that they can perfect the other?

I can drive a big truck in heels and a skirt too!  I have no confusion, gender speaking, when I lead.  I will always be a woman, but the idea that means I can't lead a wonderful tango is silly.  Plenty of very well hung guys (I'm assuming) never get the hang of it.  Why some of you carry on like this is beyond me, but that's OK.  Dance your dance.  Let me dance mine.  Enjoy your partners for the passion for the dance and music that they share, not what's in their pants.  Passion, sensuality and musicality are absolutely not defined by gender.

I frequently encounter women in workshop classes that rotate partners, who when confronted with me, approach with a furrowed brow, until we start to dance.  Once they realize that a woman can really lead, they relax........then they say, "You're the first leader that's actually lead that".....then they start to complain about the men jerking them around ......then they start to tell the men how much fun you are.......then the men have a wide range of reactions including, pride (my husband), envy, intimidation and apparently, if this list is any indication, disbelief.  Most amusing.  

I can honestly say, and I think my male partners would agree, that my following has continued to improve right along with my leading.  I encourage all the ladies to get up and grab another sitting female in the next class you take.  Why sit there passively, when you could be learning more.  You are not obliged to lead at the milonga.  The insight gained, about what it means to follow, by feeling how that woman is responding to you it invaluable.  You will learn something no matter the level of the follower.  When I take private lessons, the benefit of being able to lead that teacher and ask him to let me feel how I'm actually doing something and then how he'd like me to feel, allows me to absorb the lesson directly thru my body instead of it being a thinkin' thing.  Most people agree that men that learn to follow are better leaders.  IMHO The reverse is also true.

ME