[LCM Articles] Proposing an initiative (was Re: It's about time)

Fri Jan 26 08:13:02 EST 2007

Please Spare us your sarcasm... and your humour(less) reply.. 

for further similar funny jokes, please write to your friends and/or use www.notsofunny.blogspot.com or on www.showsomerespect.com

Date: Fri, 26 Jan 2007 02:41:10 -0500From: rabih at mit.eduTo: daliadebs at hotmail.comCC: lebanon-articles at mit.eduSubject: Re: [LCM Articles] Proposing an initiative (was Re: It's about time)I actually thought of a better solution.A coup d'etat is staged by the army led by a mid-rank officer (preferably Rum Catolic). El Amn el Dekhli, Amn el dawli, amn el 3am and all other security apparatuses are dissolved. The parliament is dissolved, and a Military Govermnent is declared. All the glorious leaders are rounded up. Samir Ja3ja3 is sent back to the same cell he was in, but this time Hassan Nasrallah is put in the same cell with him. La7oud is sent back to Syria. The Military government offers the Saudis to send them back Sa3d for a 40 Billion ransom (this might require a few Paris n (n is an integer bigger than 3) conferences. Walid Joumblat is sent to work as a sanitary worker in New York (this fulfills his wish, which he expressed to the press when he was visiting last year), and Micheal Aoun is sent back to exile. This time to Tristan da Cunha (check this link  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_da_Cunha if you want are concerned about the welfare of the general). And Berri is sent to become the speaker of parliament of the newly united republic of Mandinka (again, to learn more about the cause of a united Mandinka people check this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mandinka_people)On the level of the jamahir,    1. Any person seen with a stick, knife, rock or other primitive or not so primitive weapon is summarily shot    2. Any person below the age of 45 seen on a moped will be made to burn it on the scene and crawl back home on all four   3. All males between the ages of 16 and 28 will be required to shave their heads, where a Mao-style uniform (the women will be allowed to wear whatever they want. This, as will become clear shortly, is a necessary requisite for the economic prosperity of the state). They are required to check in at rehabilitation centers  everyday at 5 pm where they are shown propaganda material for 2 hours on the glory of the Lebanese Army in its history of struggle against all the enemy of the motherland, both internal and external. They are required to be home by 7. Any person from this category seen on the street after 7 pm is, again, summarily shot.    4. All universities, both private and public will be closed permanently, and no citizen of the state will be allowed to have an education beyond el Baccalaureat.  5. All citizens will be strictly forbidden from discussing the national situation, the regional situation and its implication on Lebanon, the roles of America, Syria or Iran or any other political topic under the risk of being detained in the sprawling prison complex that will be build in the region of raml el 3ali-cocodi.  6. The only two vocations allowed in the country will be the Military and Tourism. Downtown Beirut, the rehabilitated sea front from 3ein el mraysi to ramli el bayda, the qazas of 3aley and matn el jnoubi as well as jounieh and its surroundings will be accesses only by Tourists, presentable females that meet certain criteria (special ID cards indicating this will be issued to those female citizens), and males who work in the touristic attractions in those areas will be allowed access. 3oushtoum wa 3asha loubnan

On 1/26/07, Dalia debs < daliadebs at hotmail.com> wrote:
I think this is an excellent idea Rabih! As naive as the thought process behind an initiative may be, as long as enough growing support is garneredfor it, momentum will increase in the direction we all want to go.>From: "Rabih Zbib" < rabih at mit.edu>>To: "Habib Haddad" <hadidhabbab at hotmail.com>>CC: lebanon-articles at mit.edu>Subject: Re: [LCM Articles] Proposing an initiative (was Re: It's about >time)>Date: Thu, 25 Jan 2007 23:52:52 -0500>>So the solution is a mailing list!!>>On 1/25/07, Habib Haddad <hadidhabbab at hotmail.com > wrote:> >> >> > Great movie Abdallah !> >> > I tend to think, or at least I like to think, that most of Lebanon's>young> > generation falls in the non-political affiliation category. >Unfortunately in> > times of crisis, the need for a political affiliation forces itself>leaving> > people with no choice but to pick a party based on religion or even>worse,> > on very shallow reasons when religion is not a decisive factor. > >> > I believe this is natural to happen. People living a crisis want to have>a> > sense of attachment to a bigger group. This is how it starts and few>years> > later those people find themselves still belonging to the same group. >Most> > don't even have solid justifications for their affiliation. They just>use> > cliches imprinted on them by the medias.> >> > With today's internet reaching every house in Lebanon, it would be easy >to> > create a virtual group that gives a feeling of attachment to people.> >> > I would like to get your opinion on the following initiative:> >> > Create a non-political non-religious affiliation with very simple > > principles. No to sectarianism, No to blind political affiliation, No to> > violence of any kind.> >> > It would be naïve to think that this could resolve the country's issues, >but> > it could be a start of an ideological movement in an attempt to break>the> > vicious circle of this blind loyalty to a politcal party or its Leader.>It> > would also give a sense of attachment even for a small group of people. > >> > To succeed, this initiative should be totally anonymous. People would>join> > by signing their names and emails as show of commitment. If it is a good> > idea it will pick up on its own, and will slowly grow, and if enough > > motivated people join they will have more creative ideas on how to>evolve> > and spread the word.> >> >> >> >> >> >  ________________________________ > >  From: "Mohamad El-Husseini" <abitdodgy at hotmail.com>> > To: abdallah.jabbour at gmail.com, lebanon-articles at mit.edu> > Subject: Re: [LCM Articles] It's about time> > Date: Thu, 25 Jan 2007 21:01:58 -0500> >> >> >> >> > Thank you for posting this, Abdallah. > >> >> >> > This has been my sentiment for a long time; the sentiment that was lost>to> > anger in my last email, but which I have stated on countless occasions.> >> > A star danced, and under it they were born.> >> >  ________________________________> >> > From:  "Abdallah Jabbour" < abdallah.jabbour at gmail.com>> > To:  "LCM Articles" <lebanon-articles at mit.edu>> > Subject:  [LCM Articles] It's about time> > Date:  Thu, 25 Jan 2007 14:30:57 -0800 > >> >> >>http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8326734789464462895&q=Zarka&hl=en > >> >> >> > ============================================================> >> > Disclaimer:> > The events described in this video have not been verified by the sender >of> > this email. The sender bears no responsibility about the contents or>tone of> > the video.> >> > LCM Articles is not a discussion list.> >> > > > ============================================================> >> >> >> >> >> >> > >_______________________________________________> > >Lebanon-Articles mailing list> > >Lebanon-Articles at mit.edu> > >http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/lebanon-articles > >> >> >> >> >> >> >> > >_______________________________________________> > >Lebanon-Articles mailing list> > > Lebanon-Articles at mit.edu> > >http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/lebanon-articles> > > >> >> >> >> > _______________________________________________> > Lebanon-Articles mailing list> > Lebanon-Articles at mit.edu > > http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/lebanon-articles> >> >> >>>_______________________________________________ >Lebanon-Articles mailing list>Lebanon-Articles at mit.edu>http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/lebanon-articles _________________________________________________________________Search for grocery stores. Find gratitude. Turn a simple search intosomething more.http://click4thecause.live.com/search/charity/default.aspx?source=hmemtagline_gratitude&FORM=WLMTAG
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